This column is a few days later than usual, so I?ll skip the customary (and well-deserved) insults and get right to the big issues this week. On second thought, I?ll keep the insults. But, instead of being directed at the usual assortment of morons, they?ll be directed primarily at TNA.
Why is TNA my prime target this week? Because it is confusing.
Confusion is not a good thing in professional wrestling. Yes, there can be complex storylines, but the usual rule is: the simpler, the better. You want fans to understand what?s going on. If it takes too much effort to follow the storyline, fans won?t bother investing their time and money in it.
Sunday night is TNA?s ?No Surrender? pay-per-view. Even early on Sunday morning, the complete card for No Surrender wasn?t listed on TNA?s Web site. (TNA?s Web site, of course, is http://www.impactwrestling.com/, not www.tna.com, which adds another layer of confusion.) How are fans supposed to be enticed to buy a pay-per-view when the complete card isn?t listed?
I criticized WWE this summer for not announcing pay-per-view matches early enough to properly promote them. TNA takes this problem one step further by not even listing matches.
The main event for No Surrender features TNA World Heavyweight champion Kurt Angle defending his title against Sting and Mr. Anderson, who was just inserted into the main event during Thursday?s Impact Wrestling show. TNA seemingly was building toward a Sting vs. Ric Flair pay-per-view match, but changed directions to go back to Sting vs. Angle rematch. (The Flair-Sting match apparently will take place on Impact Wrestling.) As for Anderson being added to the match, nothing generates interest like changing the main event at the last minute (sarcasm intended).
No Surrender also features an X-Division championship match between Brian Kendrick and challenger Austin Aries. This has the potential to be an excellent match. Matt Morgan returns from injury to face the suddenly dangerous Samoa Joe, who will likely go after Morgan?s injured arm during Sunday?s match.
Now, for the not so good stuff. Mickie James is defending the Knockouts title against Winter, and Mexican America is defending the tag team championship against Pope D?Angelo Dinero and Devon. How do I know this? Because I saw it on TV. I certainly didn?t see it on the list of No Surrender matches on TNA?s Web site.
I saved the worst for last. I?ve praised TNA for implementing the Bound for Glory Series. It was a terrific idea that, in addition to determining a No. 1 contender, created interest in house shows and undercard matches. As usual, though, the terrific idea was ruined by botched execution.
First, wrestlers competed in a widely varying number of matches. Imagine an NFL schedule in which the Eagles played 12 games, the Giants played 15 and the Cowboys played nine. Doesn?t make any sense, does it? Apparently, it makes sense in TNA?s Bound for Glory standings.
Now, as we approach the climax of the Bound for Glory Series, the top four wrestlers in the standings battle at No Surrender to determine which one will face the champion at Bound for Glory in Philadelphia on Oct. 16. Logically, we?d have two semifinal matches tonight, then the winners would meet in the finals. But logic frequently doesn?t apply in TNA.
Bully Ray (49 points) faces James Storm (40 points) in one semifinal tonight. Bobby Roode (42) and Gunner (42) square off in the other semifinal. And then the winner of the Bound for Glory Series will be determined by ? who has the most points. Seriously.
Imagine the suspense of? wondering whether Beer Money partners Roode and Storm would meet in the finals. That suspense is gone. There is no final match.
There?s a reason professional wrestling doesn?t use points to determine outcomes. Fans want a decisive outcome determined in the ring, not on a scoreboard. The Bound for Glory Series should end with a big bang as two contenders battle in the ring for a title shot, not end with a fizzle as the winner is determined by who has the most points.
*****
LEGAL ISSUES: Confusing its fans isn?t even at the top of the list of TNA?s troubles. Jeff Hardy returned to Impact Wrestling on Thursday and offered an apology for, basically, showing up to a pay-per-view in no condition to work earlier this year. Meanwhile, in real life, Hardy pleaded guilty to two counts of possession of a controlled substance with intent to distribute and one count of conspiracy to traffic in a substance containing opium. Hardy was sentenced to 10 days in jail, a $100,000 fine, 30 months of probation and enrollment in a drug abuse treatment program.
As if that weren?t bad enough, Angle was arrested in Virginia for driving while intoxicated. The problem for Angle, from a legal standpoint, is that he is on probation after pleading guilty to a similar offense earlier this year in North Dakota. If it?s determined that he violated his probation, Angle could face jail time and have his driver?s license suspended. If Angle loses the World Championship tonight, his legal issues will definitely be a factor.
*****
BAD TASTE WARNING: Given Hardy?s and Angle?s legal situations, has TNA considered pitting them against each other in a ?Hell in a Cell? match? (Sorry, I couldn?t resist.)
*****
YOU SOLD OUT! Reports are that WWE?s ?Survivor Series? from Madison Square Garden in November is already sold out. The Rock is scheduled to appear on the show, although there are mixed signals as to whether he will actually be wrestling. The Rock made his WWE debut 15 years ago at Survivor Series in Madison Square Garden
*****
CHIKARA TAKES MANHATTAN: CHIKARA heads north next weekend for a Saturday night card in Brockton, Mass., and a Sunday afternoon (4 p.m.) card at The Highline Ballroom in Manhattan. Check out the events section of?CHIKARA?s Web site for more information. I?ll go over the cards in more detail in my next column.
*****
NEVER FORGET: In yet another note with a New York connection, Sunday marks the 10th Anniversary of the attacks of September 11. I?m not sure that Heel Turns is the appropriate forum for delivering 9/11 memories, but one thing that has been ignored in the coverage elsewhere is that the first large public gathering for an event after 9/11 was for Smackdown in Houston, Texas, on Sept. 13, 2011.
Remember, people were still scared there might be another attack. The memorable and patriotic show of solidarity at Smackdown made me proud to be part of the professional wrestling community.
*****
NIGHT OF CHAMPIONS: WWE?s next pay-per-view is ?Night of Champions? next Sunday. We don?t have all the matches listed yet ? Intercontinental and U.S. championship matches haven?t been announced ? but at least there are five matches listed on WWE?s Web site. That?s far better than TNA?s listing on the morning of No Surrender.
*****
MISCARRIAGE OF JUSTICE: Achilles Heel rarely makes mistakes, but when I do, I?m man enough to admit it. Last week I compiled a Top 10 list of wrestlers with weather-related names. As a faithful Heel Turns reader pointed out, however, there was a woeful ommission: Gorilla Monsoon.
As an admirer of the late, great Gorilla, I apologize for leaving him off the list. To use one of Monsoon?s favorite phrases, leaving him off the list was a miscarriage of justice.
*****
TNA ON THE ROAD: After taping Impact Wrestling early in the week, TNA will be in York, Pa., on Thursday, then head up to Wilkes-Barre on Saturday. Wilkes-Barre, of course, was terribly affected by flooding from last week?s torrential rains. If you plan on going to these cards, please check to make sure they?re not canceled.
That?s it for this week. I?ll ge back next week with a Night of Champions preview, more details on CHIKARA?s cards in Massachusetts and New York, a look at the potential impact of Ring of Honor?s new syndicated television program and the fallout from No Surrender.
Source: http://www.phillyphanatics.com/2011/09/11/heel-turns-musings-of-a-wrestling-god-18/
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